Diamonds and Pearls (1991)
The oft-mocked Jughead is the sacrificial lamb passed around the entire fanbase to reset swords and unify over. A panto villain that’s both punchline and punching bag. Whether the lion’s share of flack is earnest or Pavlovian I can’t work out but I will personally stand up to say I love its “stoopid” little face. How can you not? Okay, so it goes heavy on the acquired taste of Tony M (Prince’s vocal involvement totals less than 20 seconds) and I could go without the rant at the end that got Prince sued by his ex-manager for $5m. But the song itself is a frantic spring-cleaning of pretensions before the introverted calm of Money Don’t Matter 2 Night. Mellifluous humming from Rosie kicks things off and while you’re safely lulled, the traps are lifted and the Jughead dogs are let loose, panting and snarling, trained to attack the body and not the head. This “new dance commercial take 2” (Horny Pony was take 1) will never be fashionable but the most fun things in life never are.
